it's been a while...

9-25-11
It's been a while. I gave up on P90X--obviously. And gained it all back. Although I did start it again a few weeks ago. And I was dedicated until the day I woke up and couldn't move from the pain in my lower back. I took one too many days off to recuperate and gave up again. I guess I'll get back to it next week maybe. Although I'm thinking I'm just going to hunt down a doc to prescribe more phentermine for me.
Life is decent. Well on our way to opening the school next fall. Sierra is well on her way to graduation. Nevada's grades are much better. Dakota... well... yeah, anyway... And Canyon is still living with his dad in KY.
Saw Journey, Foreigner and Night Ranger the other night. Complete and total awesomeness, except Journey.
More explanation another night... I'm falling asleep at the keyboard. Sweet dreams...

screwy days, poisoned pizza, manual labor, long drives, sunny days

So, after screwing up last week with thinking legs was arms and putting myself ahead 3 days further than I actually was, I have sort of fixed it. Well, today is really truly day 1 of week 7. For real this time. So in one week and 4 days (w8d4) I will be taking pics. However, I may not. I cheated last night. Badly. I ate pizza. And not just a slice. I think pizza must be my crack, because I intended to have ONE bite, and just couldn't stop. I had FOUR pieces!!!!!! OMG! I am such a fat-arse! So, this morning, I did core with my BFF and just couldn't bring it. I'm thinking I am realizing what people mean when they say bad foods poison your body. I always have such a hard time getting myself back in gear after I cheat. I feel tired, lethargic and it's harder to get going. That in and of itself should be enough to keep me from cheating, right? Not. No one ever accused me of being logical. Well, maybe it will be ok. I had Special K for breakfast, and I am about to have a protein shake for lunch, and then I have to go to my manual labor job tonight (someone called in) so I'll be on my feet for 8 hours, so, maybe that will be enough to help cleanse the poisoned pizza out of my system. Tomorrow when I do Cardio, maybe I can "bring it" a little better. I wish I didn't have to go so far for work. I don't have to be there until 3, but that means I have to leave home by 2, so I have to be in the shower by 1. It''s 1215 now and I just finished working out. By the time I finish my blog update and make my shake, it will be time to get in the shower. If I worked closer, I might have time for a quick walk. It's so pretty outside. I almost feel guilty for being inside on days like today. Today would be a great day for pulling weeds. :) Oh well... Ok, I'm off to the kitchen to make my shake. Have a great Saturday, Readers.

another 1/2 lb, kenpo, size 8

Up and at 'em early today. Kenpo is done for the day. It was kind of hard today. I don't know if I just "brought it" harder than usual or what. At multiple points I had to stop because I thought my heart was going to pound its way out of my chest. At one point I was even a little dizzy. I don't think that's happened before, except week one.
Tomorrow is day 7 of week 6, which means I am one day from week 7. More than half way there! Almost time for pics again!!
A wonderful surprise was waiting for me at the scales this morning! Another half pound down. Down to 141.5 now. :) That means i am 21.5 pounds from GOAL! I know that still sounds like a lot, but when you consider I was once--at my heaviest--43 pounds from goal, it doesn't seem like so much. And the fact that I can now fit into a SIZE 8 is flipping AWESOME!!!!!! I tried on every single pair of pants, capris, shorts, and dresses in my closet last night. I own NOTHING too small now. I own quite a bit of things that are too big, but nothing in my closet is too small anymore. The dress I bought for my non-wedding back in '07, when I was working DAILY with a trainer, is HUGE on me. Like, it fell off my shoulders. That little bitty pink flowered spaghetti strapped dress my mom gave me a million years ago not only fit, but was a little too loose on me. Even in the boobs!! Not only did I fit into a size 8 pair of jeans, I raided Sierra's closet and fit into a size 9 JUNIORS!!!!! And a size 11 JUNIORS was too BIG!!! Oh yeah, P90X ROCKS!!! I wish I saw it more on the scales, but I guess as long as my body is changing shapes and I'm fitting into smaller clothes, I probably shouldn't complain.
So, I just got out of the shower and am getting ready to get dressed for the day. I think I'm going to wear the Junior size 9 jeans today. Once I'm all dolled up, I'll have a pic taken and post it.
So, if you are reading this and there is no pic attached, make sure you check back later. :)

stinky moms, kayaks, squitos, and abs

So, today should have been arm/triceps/chest, I think, followed by abs. Since I have been yearning to go kayaking, and kayaking uses my arms, chest, back, etc., I decided to replace my p90x with kayaking. My arms, shoulders and neck are killing me. But it sure was pretty out there. Until it started getting dark, and then the mosquitos started attacking the exposed parts of my legs. Not so much fun. So, now I'm going to do abs and then shower. Sierra says I stink. Well, not exactly. She actually said, "Mom, I don't know how to say this, but.... Well, I'm not trying to be mean, but... Well, Mom, you...ummmm." To which I finally responded "Stink?" She said, "Yeah, badly." So, shower after abs.

plyo, wk 6, half way, fat, eating, kayaking

Cardio X two times in one day, along with about 10 minutes of Zumba and a 10 minute Ab Blaster. Why, you ask, am I punishing myself so severely? Because I feel like all I have done today is eat. I feel extra fat today. Still at 142, but feel like I have done nothing but eat. So, I figured I deserved some self-flagellation. Now, I think I'm going to get in the shower and then crash. Tomorrow is Monday, so hopefully I will be able to get back to work on the app, get in touch with the vendors and publication reps I need to talk to, and can get back in the flow.
I really want to try kayaking. I think it will be good exercise and maybe even fun. I need someone to go kayaking with, though.
I was flipping through the tv today, which is something I NEVER do, as I despise tv, but I landed on channel CNBC. P90X infomercials were on back to back. I realized that I had a dvd called Plyometrics, which I have never seen. So I went to investigate. The reason I hadn't seen it yet was because I am doing the Lean schedule and Plyo is part of the Classic schedule. I guess I do have a little change to look forward to if I make it through this 90 days and decide to do a second round. Those infomercials were good. The people on them went through such drastic changes. I can only hope that my changes are a quarter of those I see on tv. So, I guess tomorrow is Week 6 Day 3, which is 45 days, which is HALF WAY through the program!!!!! Hell, yeah! I just wish I felt it more. So, anyway, I guess tomorrow, I will Bring It again, and maybe eat a little less, and feel a little better about myself. Today, I feel like a fatty.
So, this fatty is off to the showers. 'Night, all!

nature walk, another pound, core

So, I went on a walk today at Hawk's Bluff. It took hours to find it because the address Savannas State Park lists on the website was not accurate. Once we finally found it, it was very pleasant. The weather was just perfect, and there was a slight breeze and lots of sun. The trail was partially uphill, partially downhill, and somewhat neutral. The birds were beautiful. Here are a few pics from the day.
So, in addition to my mile and a half walk, I came home and did Core with the BFF a million miles away. I really think Core maybe be moving to the top of my favorites list. Oh, and I almost forgot: I lost another pound! I am down to 142!!!

green shakes, chocolate lumps, kenpo, shakeology, blah, cold

Ok, so, Kenpo (from yesterday) is done. And on top of it, I pulled out the old Ab Circle and dusted it off for about 8 minutes. Will do tonight's stretch with the BFF if she ever gets home from work. Now, let's talk about Shakeology. The coolest ever Beachbody Coach (Angie) sent me a sample of the chocolate and a sample of the greenberry. I tried the make the chocolate one the other day before I left for Miami. I was in a hurry, and maybe I didn't take my time, because I don't think I did it correctly. The packaging says 8 ounces of water. So, I pulled out my to go thermo cup thing and measured out 8 oz of h2o, and added crushed ice. I poured in the packet, put the lid on and shook the cup. And shook, and shook and shook. And then I tasted. It was thick, lumpy and while the taste was ok, the texture was so bad I couldn't handle it. So, this morning, I decided to use the blender, and more ice. This morning, however, was not chocolate. It was Greenberry. I used 8 ounces of water, crushed ice, and a blender. The consistency was MUCH better. Kind of like an icy shake. The color was somewhat off-putting. And the smell: I thought I would vomit so I held my breath. The odor should have indicated the taste wouldn't be much better. That was the nastiest thing I think I have ever tasted. It is a very good thing that Shakeology allows you to sample before you purchase, because if I had actually spent money on that, I would be slightly upset! Gross! Now, to be fair, maybe the chocolate one would have been better blended, but I did follow the directions and it wasn't great. So, if you're considering the Shakeology, I would encourage you to sample it first!
Now, let's talk about my beloved P90X. I didn't think I would make it past week one, and here I am at the end of week 5. Week one was hard. It got easier. So why has this week been so hard? Is it because I am starting to get bored with it? Is it because results aren't as quick-coming? he scales haven't moved in almost 2 weeks, except that one half pound I was so excited about last week. I'm trying not to be discouraged by that, especially since I can see the differences in the pictures. But, I still don't feel like anything is happening now. It's been too cold again to go out for my walks. I am under mega-stress with getting this school together and open. And this week was my time of the month, not to mention the whole hospital-not-breathing-thing at the end of last week. I have felt very blah for the last week, and very unhealthy. I hope this upcoming week gets better. Maybe it's the weather. Maybe we should move to Puerto Rico. Is it warmer there right now? The whole point of living in South Florida is to be warm while the rest of the country freezes. I'm not suppose to be cold, too.
Anyway, the washer is still broken. The repair people will be out Monday. So, yesterday, my hubby and I sat at a laundry mat and did laundry. Yuck. It was ok. We played cards while we waited. It was our "date night." I said I wanted to do something different. i guess I got it! :)

blah, miami, work outs, blah, washers, blah, did i mention blah?

I feel rundown. I feel tired, lethargic, and thick-headed (not to be confused with stubborn). I feel like I'm coming down with something, but since I just finished a round of anti-biotics from my middle of the night ER trip, I don't see how. I want to work out. I want time to work out. I want more sleep. Some might call me needy. Maybe... Today is legs and abs, I think. I plan to do it tonight. I plan to sweat. I hope I don't fall asleep before I can make it happen. I know I'm suppose to wait on my BFF to skype/work-out when she gets off tonight, but that will be after 8 and if I wait, I won't do it. And I come back to Miami tomorrow. Which means another short night of sleep, another early morning, another long drive, and so on... It probably wouldn't be so bad if my husband didn't snore. Maybe if his Breathe Right Strips actually worked.... Maybe then I could sleep through the night. Oh well... I guess I'll sleep when I'm dead. At the rate I'm going, that may not be too long....
So, I had to run over to the campus today, which is literally 2 blocks from my school, and it took me 45 minutes to get there. Nope, not Miami traffic this time. My geographically-impaired, directionally-challeneged self is to blame this time. Honestly, I could get lost in a wet paper bag. I should have walked. It would have been quicker... Oh well...
Well, leaving Miami in about an hour, stopping off at the manual labor job to take a test (I think) and then going home to work out, fix dinner, work on the app, sleep. Maybe I will search for a laundry mat tonight. Did I mention my washer is still broken? The fix-it guy had to order parts. The parts won't be in for 3-5 days. ... Yay. Ok, for some reason I am very blah today.

cloning, energy, landing on heads, showers, work and washers

I need to be cloned. I need more hours in the day. I need more energy. I need more sleep. I need help. I need to be cloned. So, I'm on week 5, and today is day 3. Chest, shoulders and triceps, followed by ab ripper x. I missed cardio yesterday, so I started with that this morning. I figured I would get up and get my workouts done, so I can focus on work the rest of the day. Cardio was awesome. Felt good. Then I popped in the arms dvd. Not. The weights work was fine, and some of the push-ups were okay. But seriously, one armed push-ups? And those side ways push up walking things??? Who's idea of funny is that??? Oh, and Tony really should have said to put a pillow where your head will land when doing those pike press things!! My head is STILL hurting! I don't think I'm going to like this one. And the last one for the day should be Ab Ripper X, but after cardio and arms, I decided abs may have to wait. If I don't do them tonight, I'll do them tomorrow when I'm suppose to be doing yoga, because we all know I won't be doing that! I'm feeling kind of light-headed, dizzy and unfocused. Everything is sort of blurry. I think I'm going to jump in the shower before I try to do anymore work.
Oh, and on top of everything else, my washing machine decided it didn't want to work anymore as of yesterday. Gladly, it's less than a year old, so still barely covered under the manufacturers warranty. But the people cant get out here until Tuesday between 12 and 3. Oh course I have a 1245 appointment. Like I said, clone me.
Still waiting on that call from the district. And for those of you who have no clue what I'm talking about when I'm talking about work, look to the right. See that link for College Preparatory Academy of the Treasure Coast? Click on it and check out the site. Make sure you look at the Public Announcements page. That will fill you in. :) If you're interested, that is. Anyway, off to the showers. Make it a good one!

day 1 vs day 30 pics

First of all, no comments on this one! I know I'm not skinny yet, but since I do see a difference in my body--especially the fat rolls on my back, I thought I would go ahead and post the day 1 and day 30 pics. Maybe if you are considering P90X, this will be some motivation for you. The scales don't move quite as quickly as I would like, but the clothes are definitely fitting differently, and I think I see a little change in the pics. So, here we go, and day 60 pics will be up in 30 days. :) Today is day one of week 5. Wish me luck!
And in case you can't figure it out, the day 1 poses are to the left of the day 30 poses. all the same poses are next to each other so you get a true side by side. :) Now that I have posted mine, I challenge my BFF to post hers!
btw, if u click play and it loads, it starts zooming in. just click on stop and zoom out to actually see them.

Digital collage generated with Smilebox

30days, districts/states, strangulation in my sleep, budgets, hospitals, the norm, life

So, right now I should be uploading my day 1 and day 30 pics and talking about how great my workout was today. But... Life intervened. Or maybe death tried to intervene. Great day yesterday led to not so great night and pretty long and uncomfortable day.
The drive to Miami yesterday took almost 4 hours. Usually that drive is 2-3 depending on traffic. Yesterday I did about 10 miles an hour for a quarter of the drive. And no, there were no wrecks. Just your typical south floridians who don't know how to drive. Wait. That's probably not fair. South Floridians can drive. It's all the q-tippped snow-birds. Yeah, that's it. So, anyway... I get to Miami, the day is good. I learned a lot.
I left Miami at 2:30 and had a phone conference with the state at 3, wherein I was informed that the district, if the district so chooses, could agree to work things out for an August 2011 opening WITHOUT having to go to the DOE meeting on February 15. Talk about excited! But I would have to have everything done and resubmitted in time for the panel to review it and make a recommendation to the board to reconsider it, and all that done before the 14th because that's the deadline for removing ourselves from the DOE agenda. So, remember last summer? The month leading up to my August first deadline?  Where I was working all day and all night and glued to the computer and became best friends with the guy at Kinkos Fed Ex? Yeah, well, we're having a repeat. So, between hanging up the phone with the state at 3:45 and stopping for gas at 5, I managed to work in a phone conference with my consultant and finance guy, schedule a 9 AM finance meeting for today, schedule a phone conference with the district at 11:15 today and work up a plan for getting everything done quickly. And somehow in there I managed to arrange to take the next 3 weeks off from the manual labor job to focus on all this. You gotta love modern technology! Oh, and I still made it home in time to pick up my husband for our 5:30 appointment in Stuart (yes, I realize I drove north from Miami to St. Lucie to turn around and go back south to Stuart; and yes, I further realize that spent no less than 7 hours in the car yesterday).
So, our appointment went well. And then we went to dinner together. We are starting date nights again. We used to go every Wednesday night, for about 2 years, and then we stopped. So, we ae trying to incorporate them again. Anyway, we went to a Mexican place we've been wanting to try: Santa Fe Cafe, in Stuart. Small, but quaint. Food was okay. I ordered the same thing I order at EVERY mexican restaurant we go to: chicken flautas and margaritas. We were home by 9 and I was in bed shortly thereafter (thanks to the Ritas). I was up a few times through the night to potty, and was fine the last time at 2 a.m. Then, around 4 or 430 I woke up because I couldn't breathe. The entire left side of my throat felt like it had swollen shut. Doctor's office didn't open until 9, and urgent care didn't open until 8. I was terrified the swelling was going to spread and I would end up needing a tracheotomy. So, I went to the ER. IV steroids for the swelling, IV antibiotics for the unknown cause of the swelling, and the doc wanted to do IV Benadryl. That one I refused. After all, I had a meeting in just a few hours that I couldn't be knocked out for. Yes, I still intended to go to my meetings, straight from a near-death experience. What, you think Grim can stop me?? Ha! I laugh in the face of death! Or at least in the face of swollen throats. So, anyway, back to the story. So, the doc has never seen anything like this, the pharmacist thought it odd, the nurses had no clue, and my best friend (also a pharmacist) thinks I'm just weird. No apparent cause. But the steroids did bring down the swelling enough that I could breathe and talk with my head in a normal position--oh, I forgot to mention. With my throat so swollen, I could only breath and talk while looking at the ceiling, which gave everyone a great view of straight up my nose. Anyway, a script for steroids, antibiotics and prescription strength benadryl is my diet for the next few days. On a good note: I was released from the hospital in time to rush home, shower and make it to my 9 o'clock, where we spent the next  few hours reallocating funds and developing an already developed budget to make the district happy. Then the 1115 phone conference with the district went decently. My contact there was putting in a phone call to the district attorney to get an interpretation of some district policy. If the attorney interprets the policy as we hope, then the review panel can choose to look at the revised application and resubmit it to their board for reconsideration. That's all best case scenario. Worst case: they don't and we go to the DOE meeting Feb. 15th.
So, like a good girl and adhering to the promise I made to the doc, I came home and took my meds, even the benadryl, and have been sitting here working on the revisions since 12:00 in a drug induced fog. A little bit ago the husband got me to go on a walk with him and the puppies--I needed the fresh air, but only made 2 streets before I was too weak to go on. So, I decided to take a break and update the blog, and then I will go right back to my app. If I make it to sleep tonight, do me a favor and cross your fingers that I breathe/live/make it through the night. It would suck if I died before I got the school approved.
Sweet dreams, peeps!

1/2 pounds, amped up walks, honking at fat girls

I almost sprinted for the scales when I got up this morning. I just KNEW I had to have lost something. After all, I went to bed starving last night. My stomach growling kept me up half the night! But, it was all worth it! I moved a half a pound. I don't care if it's only a half pound, it's still movement!!!!!!! I've been stuck for so long and was getting soooooo discouraged. So, that motivated me again. So, as soon as I got Nevada off to school, I rushed to my tv to push play! I did my cardio and then decided to go for a walk. Lately I have been walking 3 miles. Today, I only walked 2 and 1/4. Why, you ask, am I slacking? Well, for one, like I just said, I had just finished an hour of Cardio X. And for another, I amped up my walk. :) What's that mean, you're wondering. :) (See, I can read your mind) That means, I took weights with me. Needless to say, my arms are absolutely killing me now. But that's okay. Every time I started feeling the burn in them, I just moved them more. I was imagining my--what's that called? The floppy, flabby turkey-neck like things under your arms if you make a muscle and you're fat. Whatever that's called--I imagined it just disappearing, and I continued on. Of course, those of you who have never been fat have no clue what I'm talking about, but that's okay. I know. My fellow fat readers know. And soon, very soon, I will be able to forget!!!!!!!! (Evil laugh inserted here)
Ya know what? I'm i n a really good mood today. I shouldn't be. It is a somber day. I have a wake to go to this evening. I shouldn't feel good. But I do. Losing that half pound, working out, and working out some more, and my really yummy pineapple-strawberry whey protein drink is setting just right with me this morning. Oh, and I get to take my 30 day pictures the day after tomorrow. Although, I probably won't do it until Friday morning, because I'll be in Miami Thursday, and that evening I have an appointment, then a date with the hubby. So, I'll probably do it first thing Friday morning, before my workout. If I see a difference in the first and 30 day pics, I'll post them. If I don't see a difference, I won't. You'll just have to wait until the 60 day shots. :)
Oh, and one last thing. I know something must be going right, because while I was walking this morning, I got honked at. :) Granted, I'm wearing a white shirt and spandex workout pants, but still. I mean, seriously, how many fat girls can get away with wearing this and still get honked at?? :) I have officially gone from "I think I can" to "I will." It's a good feeling. Have a great day, Readers, Followers and Stalkers. :)

Kenpo, domestic animals, stretch, and slinky clothes

Ok, so, I went ahead and pushed play. I did my Kenpo workout. I felt a little better after that. I went on a 3 mile walk with the puppies, to the park and back. I hadn't been to this park before and was hoping it would have a track. I walked the mile and a half there to find no track and a sign that prohibited domestic animals. I guess farm animals or wild animals would have been ok, but not domestic ones on leashes. Go figure. So we walked a mile and a half back home. Then I chatted with my bestest friend in the whole wide world. And then I did Stretch X. Not super motivated through the stretch. Oh, well. So, tomorrow when I step on the scales, I hope to see some movement. If not, I'm not sure I will be motivated to continue. Tomorrow is Cardio. I like Cardio.
After cardio, and some housework, I am going to be heading to WPB to pick up a friend, and then to BB to a wake. Then Wednesday and Thursday will be Miami. And manual labor on Friday. Oh, and I almost forgot: I have a date Thursday night when I get back from Miami--with my hubby. :) Maybe I can drop about 5 pounds by then and fit into something slinky. :)

stuck in neutral and thinking abt quitting.

SOOOOOOOO frustrated!!!!! I have spent almost a WEEK at 143.5. I can't move! I need a nudge, a boost, SOMETHING! why am i bothering to work out if im no longer seeing results????????? and like today, im doubling up bc i skipped yesterday. and it's actually warm out for the first time in weeks, so i thought i might even supplement with a walk. but why should i bother? im expending all this energy for nothing at this point. even losing the weight slower, i still dropped at least a HALF a pound every few days. I'm STUCK! maybe this program isn't working... ok, I'm giving it one more shot. im going to go do my 2 days worth of workouts, go for a walk, have a protein shake, and that's it. when I weigh in tomorrow, if i don't see something change, i quit.

skates, walks, and plateaus

Ok, so it's been a few days since I posted last. We could chalk that up to being very busy (spent two days in Tallahassee, cleaned the house, did laundry, worked today, etc). Or we could tell the truth. But before we tell the truth, let me just say that I am still working out, although my depression from our news in Tallahassee did lead me to Checker's (for those of you up north, that's our version of Rally's). Other than that, my indiscretions have been minimal. And in addition to working our with my P90x, I'm even supplementing. As a matter of fact, I just got back from an HOUR of brisk walking (yes, even though it's cold here and those of you up north are looking out your windows balking at the thought of an after-dark walk, it's still warmer in south Florida than where most of you are). I think if one can walk a mile in 15 minutes, then I walked 3--but it was brisk, so maybe 3.5 or 4! Anyways, I digress. So, where was I? ... Oh yes, supplementing. And the other morning I walked  a mile or a mile and a half with my husband. And yesterday, I roller bladed (yes, I did, and no, I have no broken bones or even bruises) about a half mile. Why only a half, you ask? Well, I'll tell you. Even though I didn't fall on my face, or butt, it hurt. My lower back was killing me from the way I had to bend at the waist in effort to keep from falling backwards. My knees hurt from the way I had to bend them to keep from falling forward (gravity and boobs, mind you). And my feet hurt from a row of wheels running straight up the middle of them! Who on earth invented these things??? And what ever happened to those cool skates we have when I was little? You know the ones with 4 wheels evenly spaced out on each skate? At least with those my weight was more evenly dispersed. So, I have decided that roller blades were invented by the same people who invented yoga, and they are meant for skinny people. There is just way too much weight in a fat persons body to put that much pressure on one section of two little feet. Oh, and little feet--that's another thing. The smaller your feet (mine are a size 5.5) the more weight is concentrated in a single area. Yeah, so roller blading half a mile supplemented my P90x. So, anyway, now that you know I have been pretty good diet wise, and doing even more than my P90x calls for, we move on to the truth. Remember, a few lines up I mentioned telling you the truth about why I haven't posted in a few days. Right.... Ok, so, I haven't posted because I am embarrassed. I was doing soooo well and losing weight so quickly. Then, all of a sudden, it stopped. I hit a plateau. I dropped from 151 to 143.5 and have been 143.5 for a few days now. I'm stuck in neutral. Not moving. Stagnant. And, bottom line, still fat. Granted, not as fat as I was December 23, but still fat. Since I suddenly stopped making progress, I was too embarrassed to post. Someone (maybe a mom or grandmother) once told me that if I didn't have something nice to say, not to say anything at all. So, I was choosing to not say anything at all. Then why am I posting now? Because even though I only have one "follower" on here, evidently I have some stalkers, and those stalkers keep asking why I'm not posting.
What is the difference in a follower and a stalker? A follower clicks the word "follow" over there to the right, and a stalker comes and lurks. Lurking is reading the blog (or fb page) without  being friends with or "following." The point seems to be so that the poster (me in this case) doesn't know s/he is being followed. So, if you, reader, are one of my stalkers, ask yourself this: why don't I want Erika to know I'm reading her blog? If you don't have an answer, then look to the right... Yes, over there, and click FOLLOW. If you have a good reason, then, hey, stalk away. I don't mind. But stalkers aren't allowed to complain when I don't post for a few days! Only true followers are. :)
So, now what? Well, I guess I'm going into the living room to do the dreaded yoga. It's day one of week 4. In one week I get to take pictures again. I was excited by that prospect when I was losing an average of a pound a day, but not so much anymore... Oh well... I guess I'll weigh again tomorrow. Until then, Namaste!

how is this possible????

You've got to be kidding me! was the first thought that came to mind, as I stepped off the scale and back on it again, this morning. Just to make sure it worked correctly the first time, mind you. Yep. It was still the same. The scales informed me, this morning,  that I am losing an average of a pound a day. Today, I am at 144. That's 7 pounds!!!!! Can you really, truly lose a pound a day? I mean, maybe this is some screwy dream and I will wake up and be like 50 pounds heavier than when I went to bed. No! Wait! Think positive. So, a pound a day. At this rate, I'm looking at being 90-some pounds by summer! Hmmm... There's a thought! Nope. I think I'll stop between 110 and 120. I think that's good for me. After all, I'm short, or so people tell me. A little less than 5 feet. I know it's not tall, but, short? Ok, if society says so. Whatever, I'm stoked. Off to work out and then get an oil change and pack for Tallahassee! 

total loss: 6 pounds in 17 days

Yesterday was so busy, I committed a crime. Not a crime against humanity or a crime against society, but a crime against myself. I skipped my workout! Oh, the horror! So, I am up at 7 this morning, bright eyed and bushy tailed, to do yesterday's workout and today's. So, as soon as I log off this blog, I will do Cardio X, Arms and Shoulder and Ab Ripper X. My calves, especially the left one, for some reason, is still hurting. I'm starting to think I did something to it, maybe in downward dog? (For you pervs out there, that's a stretch position). After my workoutS, I will shower, dress and head down to Royal Palm Beach to see my friend, and meet her new baby girl. Then form there, off to my part-time manual labor job, where I will be on my feet until close to midnight tonight.
On another, and more exciting note, I weighed again this morning. I know, I know! I'm not suppose to weight daily. I am aware of this. Yet, I continue to do so. And you know there are tons of other women out there who weigh daily, as well. It really does help motivate me. Especially when I see a pound or half pound drop. It make me see this program truly is working and makes me want to go back and do it again. And when I expect that I have gained back 10 pounds, and only see one or a half of one, then I don't feel so badly about my mishaps. So, lecture all you want, I will continue to weigh daily. And today's weighing in revealed that I have lost yet, another pound! I am down to 145!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! For those of you who don't remember, or didn't start reading my blog on December 23rd, I started at 151. If I may say so myself, I rock! And so does P90X. And so does my sister in law, for turning me onto it. I can't believe I have actually stuck with it this long. I can't wait for picture day. :) And for all of you out there who are considering p90x, stop considering, order it and PUSH PLAY! And for all of you struggling with the first week of p90x, I promise you, it DOES GET EASIER! Keep PUSHING PLAY! And rock on!

day 1 of wk 3

So, I am on day 1 of the 3rd week. That means I am half way through one third of the program. :) Yeah, I know. I'm pushing it. So, since last night was my anniversary, we went out to dinner at the Melting Pot. I have wanted to go for years, and finally got to. Needless to say, I ate, and ate and ate. It was sooooo good. I don't feel so guilty this time, though. Maybe because it was a special occasion, or maybe since the last time I cheated I actually lost instead of gaining. Either way, this time, I did gain back one pound of the 5 I lost. So, I'm back to 4. It really is okay, though, because at the end of dinner I was sure I had gained back all 5! I'll take one, instead. Now, no more excuses, back to the diet.
I just finished my workout for the day. I even did the bonus round this time. Well, parts of it. I tried the bonus round. That's more honest. I tried. :) I don't know about the scales, the inches, the clothes or the shape of my body, but what I can say for sure, is that my strength is increasing. I notice each time I do one of these that I can do a little more than last time. Whether it be more reps, high lifts, going a little longer, or whatever. Each time, there is improvement over the last time. I guess that's something.
On another note, remember how the day before yesterday I doubled up workouts as penance for my cheating Monday night? Well, note to self and anyone else who may be considering it: don't ever do the legs workout and Kenpo on the same day!!!! I did the legs in the morning, Abs and Kenpo in the evening, and my calves are still on fire! This mornings workout was slightly modified because of how badly my calves are hurting. It wasn't so bad yesterday--maybe because it was Stretch X, but I didn't start hurting until last night. Of course, I was in heels, too. But for whatever reason, my calves are making walking difficult. Oh well.
I am actually looking forward to the pics in 2 weeks. I hope I can see a change. I know it's not always reflected on the scales, especially since I am building muscle, too, and muscle weighs more than fat. I just want to be able to visually see some sort of improvement. Either in the mirror, in pics or in my clothes.
So, I went through my old vids this morning, and pulled out the balance ball dvd and the ball, the body by jake videos that go with our cardio cruiser and our hips and thigh sculptor, and the flirty girl fitness dvds I bought years ago that are still in their wrappers, and the yoga vhs-also still wrapped.I found a p90x for women facebook page and some of the women there are using hybrid workouts, where they are incorporating or replacing part of p90x with other workouts. I want to stay true to p90x to see if it really works, but  I think maybe I'll add in some other stuff occasionally. I expended some energy taking the wrappers off those this morning. :) Does that count?
Ok, going to shower, and then do some work on the appeal. I leave to Tallahassee Monday for the hearing. I don't feel super prepared, but on a good note: our consultant arranged his schedule to accompany me. At least the budget projections and financials will be handled well, even if I blow curriculum! :)
On a totally different subject, my daughter died her hair purple last night. It was an accident. But she had to go to school like that today--I told her to put it in a ponytail and nobody would notice. I hope no one said anything to her. We'll fix it tonight after school. :) And lastly, my business partner/assistant principal and good friend is headed to the hospital to have her baby today. Good thoughts, energy and hope go with you, Joann. Love you! Can't wait to meet Ali!

Unbelievable!

So, I cheated last night, and feel the ultimate guilt, but then get on the scales this morning... And not only do I not gain back the 4 pounds I lost (like I expected), but I LOST another one!!!!! How is that possible? I do not understand. Either way, if cheating makes me lose another pound, maybe I should cheat more often? No, just kidding. I know this was probably my only freebee. So, I still doubled my workout for the day and was well behaved. I had a blueberry/strawberry protein shake for brunch, and a salad for dinner. So, all in all, I am down 5 pounds in 13 days. :) Yay! Loving P90X!!! Actually, I'm not loving it. Im sweating it big time. I don't know if it was my lack of sleep from last night, or what, but I found all my workouts today to be very difficult. I'm probably going to cheat again tomorrow. It's my anniversary, and one of my mother-and-father-in-laws sent us gift certificates to the Melting Pot for xmas. I have always wanted to eat there, and my husband has never taken me. Now he has no excuse! I wonder if they have any kind of healthy food? :) Ok, well, I'm off to the living room for some Kenpo.  

I cheated today

Today is day number 12, and I cheated. I tried so hard to be good about it. But I did, nonetheless, cheat. I got up this morning, and since my youngest son decided to void my house of grapefruit, I had a piece of peanut-butter bread. This is okay since it was wheat, and I do pb regularly to keep up my proteins. Lunch was a few bites of lentil soup and a few bites of strawberry chews (fat free). But, dinner, evil, masochistic dinner, did me in. It's the kids last night of freedom before returning to the drudgery of school tomorrow, so I wanted to have a nice evening with them. We went to my husband's restaurant, Carrabba's, in NPB. The salad that I usually eat there (mediterranean) is no longer available, so I had to choose something else. And I couldn't help myself. I ordered Rigatoni Martino. It was soooooo good. I skipped the soup, salad, appetizer, and desert. Although I did have a few slices of bread and a glass of blackberry sangria. I only ate about half the bowl. I didn't eat until I was full--only until I was no longer hungry. That was a new experience for me. I always feel guilty leaving food on my plate--probably a result of some traumatic childhood experience. Either way, guilt or no, I stopped tonight. My youngest son helped to alleviate some of the guilt by finishing it off for me. So, even in my pathetic lack of self-discipline, my obvious lack of willpower, and my blatant lack of determination, I did try to be good while cheating. Does that count for something? Anything at all? It tasted sooooo good. But I feel so guilty now for having consumed it. I keep thinking about what the scales are going to say tomorrow. I keep thinking about the potential for gaining back all 4 of the pounds I lost. Tomorrow, yes, that's it! Tomorrow I will castigate myself. Tomorrow, I will assuage my guilt through double X. Not only will I do day 13, but I will redo day 12 in effort to reverse the effects of the only real, non-rabbit food of which I have partaken in the last 12 days. Oh, bad, bad me! Maybe tomorrow will be a better day. Tomorrow, I will drink water and eat ice-cubes. Tomorrow I will be better. I just won't think about it anymore today. I'll think about this tomorrow. After all, tomorrow is another day! -Scarlett O'Hara

another lb down

Four pounds, 11 days. Wish it were 11 pounds in four days, but hey, I'll take what I can get. At least I am seeing something happening, even if it is just on the scales. Wish I could see it more in the mirror or the clothes, but I guess I need to be patient. And I did put on a pair of jeans the other day that I haven't had on in a while. That felt good. Now, for the size sixes! Ha! Oh, well. I can dream. Tonight, after work, I get to do my least favorite: yoga. I wonder if they make yoga designed specifically for the short and fat? I think not. If you never hear from me again, it's because I have pretzel-fied myself this evening. Tomorrow's headline will read either "Woman found strangled by her own body" or "Woman found suffocated by her own flesh." In either case, "woman" will be me. :)
Honestly, though. I don't know if it is the P90X or the Eating For our Blood Type, but something must be working. And while the workouts aren't quite as intense as everyone made them sound, they are somewhat difficult. I have done so well with my eating. I really have. Usually, I would cheat and say, it's only one cheeseburger, or one small fry, and I'll be good the rest of the week. But I haven't done it this time-yet. Last night, I wanted to so badly. See, Taco Bell is on my way home, and they have that fresco menu, so I thought, I really wanted to stop and it wouldn't be so bad. After all, I had been good all day. But I didn't. And then I didn't ask my husband to bring home a margarita pizza on his way home. And I didn't send my daughter for ice cream when I got home. And I didn't cheat. And while that hurt last night, and I struggled last night, this morning, when I got on that scale and saw another pound missing, it felt so good! Can you imagine? I mean, if I had eaten any of those things I wanted last night, I wouldn't be a pound down today. And this morning, while I was working out, every time I wanted to quit, I thought about that one pound, and how if I kept going, maybe I could lose one more. Who knew one pound held so much power? :) So, now, to make it through today. This morning was a grapefruit, and one slice of peanut butter bread. Lunch/dinner will consist of lentil soup and a plum. I think I can do this. I think blogging about it helps. I can see my progress in black in white, and I feel more accountable. I don't know if anyone is reading this or not, but I guess it helps to think that someone is, and that's the accountability aspect. And if there is anyone reading this, and if the reader is an overweight, middle aged, mother of 4 who has struggled for the last 10 years with her weight, her body image and her will power, please know, if I can do it, anyone can.