another day in the life

Just because I'm nice to you doesn't mean I forgive you. Just because I'm not screaming and yelling, that doesn't mean I'm not angry. Just because I don't weep, that doesn't mean I'm not hurt. And just because you think you're in the clear, doesn't mean I won't eventually exact my revenge. You don't know when, where, or how, but I will. And I'm thinking that I'm well on my way, because I will be beautiful again soon. I will have my body back. I will be healthy again. You will look at me and want me, or want to be me, or maybe, hate me, in 81 more days. :)
Today was day 9. I wanted to do my Cardio X before I went to work today, but I couldn't do it. I set my alarm for 6, and I tried, but I just couldn't bring myself to get out of bed. So, I reset the alarm for 7, and I went to work. I worried all day that I wouldn't be in the mood to do it when I got home. I worried I would be too tired, or my legs and feet would hurt too badly, that I wouldn't have the energy. But, I came home, changed clothes, and did Cardio X. I did it. I did it. I did it. I poured sweat, and my kicks weren't as high at the end as they were in the beginning, and my legs weren't as straight as they should have been during superman-banana, but I DID IT. And I will do it again tomorrow. And the next day. And the next day. And everyday, until I have my body back. People tell me all the time how young I look, how my face looks like I'm in my early 20's. Well, baby, guess what? My body will look like a teenagers before I'm done! Ok, so maybe not a teenager. Maybe a mid-20 something. A mid-20 something that has had 4 kids. And been stretch-marked. And scarred. And probably kinda floppy. But, damnit, I will get there!!!!
Breakfast today was a blender of pineapple, ice and blueberries again. Lunch was a big plum and some dried apricots. Dinner was an adventure. :) Dinner consisted of fresh market broccoli, baby spinach, onion, pumpkin seeds, soy beans, flax seeds, olive oil, sherry, tofu, mrs. dash, and soy sauce all tossed into the electrics skillet and stir-fried. It was actually not-bad. Nevada, my youngest at 13, commented that the meant was undercooked. I didn't correct him. Then he asked if he could add salt. After adding a little salt, he ate about half the bowl before walking into the kitchen and adding a slice of cheese to the mixture. Yuck! But he at it all. his biggest complaint was there were too many seeds. Once he finished and had his bowl rinsed and loaded, I called him back into the dining room. The conversation went like this:
Me: You didn't ask me what kind of meat that was.
Nevada: I know. I just assumed it was chicken.
Me. Did it taste like chicken?
Nevada: Not really. Don't tell me, mom. I don't want to know.
Me: ok.
Nevada: No, tell me. It wasn't what I think it was, was it? I'm going to go throw up.
Me: (barely stifling a laugh) What do you think it was?
Nevada: Fish? Tuna?
Me: No. It was not an animal of any kind.
Nevada: Oh, no. I HATE TOFU!
Me: How do you know you hate it? You've never had it before.
Nevada: I just did. And I hated it!
Me: You ate all of it.
Nevada: Oh. I did. Yeah, well, I still hate it.
And he walks out of the room. I am still laughing. Happy New Years, everyone. I hope your 2011 is as successful as your 2010. How do I know if your 2010 was successful, you ask? Well, you lived through it, as is evident by the fact that you are reading this post. I think living through it makes it a success. I know it does for me. Namaste, Readers. And be safe.

day 1 of wk 2

So, we can call this day 1 of week 2, or day 8 for short. It was core synergistic. Day one of week one was impossible. I did it, but it was't pretty and I skipped a lot. Today, I broke a real sweat. Today, I did everything. Today I did almost all of the reps of each exercise. And I LOVE superman-banana! I even did push-ups today without my wrist feeling like it was going to snap in half. Maybe this will get easier. I also weighed this morning. Three pounds in one week. While that's good, I've done it before, so I'm not getting too excited.
Breakfast this morning consisted of a blender full of blueberries and pineapples with a little ice. Mmm-hmm good! And of course, my spoonful of peanut butter after my workout. Now, I'm off to the shower.
On another note: why do people feel the need to lie? If you do something, and you're man enough to do it, then be man enough to take responsibility for your actions--BEFORE you get caught. And when you lie, and are caught, you forfeit the right to act hurt when your character is questioned or your word not believed.

eating for ur blood type

So, a while back I heard about "eating for your blood type." It peaked my interest, but then I quickly forgot about it. A few months ago I read something about it online. Then a few weeks ago, I was listening to a radio talk show with a few doctors discussing it. Needless to say, I took an interest and started doing some research. My blood type is A positive and for the last 2 days, I have eaten for my blood type. I made a carrot/honey soup yesterday, and today I made lentil soup. It was actually very good. Surprise, surprise. Until yesterday, I didn't even know what a lentil was. :) So, P90X plus eating for my blood type may result in a healthier me for 2011. I know, I know. P90X has it's own nutrition guide. Well, if this doesn't work, then I'll try that. But at the moment, I want to do it this way. I'm actually excited about having made it a week. I hope I can keep it up. I am looking forward to day 30 pictures. I think. Maybe. But then again, maybe not. We'll see...

kenpo x

Kenpo X ROCKS! Ok, so maybe, just maybe, when they developed this one, they took my fat rolls into consideration. I was actually able to do everything and keep up--kind of. Do everything-yes. Keep up... Well, they went a little faster than me, but I did it, and I did it all! The only thing I think they forgot to consider this time was that not all of us a graceful, swan-like ballerinas. Some of us are what others might refer to as clumsy, graceless, and oops-prone. I said I did it. I didn't say it was pretty. I also didn't say that my left legged kicks were as high or straight as my right side. But I don't care. The point is, people, I DID IT!!!. The whole damn thing! And I got my heart rate up, and I was sweating by the time we were half way done. And... wait for it.....I...actually....ENJOYED it!!!!!! WTH????? ME? Enjoyed a workout???? What's up with that? The best part was when I was punching or kicking and could imagine anybody's face I wanted right there. :) I actually found that if I did imagine someone there, that my moves were a little sharper and more controlled. Hmmm..... Who knew?
Ok, off to the shower, and maybe I'll hit the market today. Then I need to come back to the house and work on the CSP and appeal. This is gonna be a good day. :)

yoga x

Yoga was invented by skinny tall people for skinny tall people. And if that's off the mark, they at least didn't consider short fat people when designing the majority of these poses. I mean, really! Triple D boobs here and at least 3 full fat roll below them. Yet, somehow, I am suppose to roll up onto my shoulders from my back and be a straight line while not suffocating from the boobs on my face and the fat rolls right behind and pressing down onto my throat. Not to mention the laughable part of the "straight line." Then at some point, we moved from runners pose to some sideways twisted thing where the right hand fell behind the back and the left hand reach through the legs and up the butt and around the back to grab the other hand. Ummmm....... my arms are proportionate to my body and unfortunately, I'm not Gumbi-fied. how the hell am i suppose to REACH? And this whole balance pose thing??? Yeah, right! No way the designer of those consider people my shape. I'm top heavy, middle heavier, and so short I have no base and forget center of gravity-I'm ALL gravity. And what sadist came up with this crane pose? I mean, really? Forget that I would probably end up in the emergency room from a busted nose if I could even get into that pose, but how about the excruciating pain in my arms where my knee-caps dig in. Oh, and two skinny wrists cannot support all this fat and weight. Yeah, I said skinny wrists. It's probably the only part of me I can call skinny. Those and my pinky fingers. So, yeah, I think I believe this P90X will work, and I like the fact that in most of the dvds he shows you how to modify for your level, but I really think they missed the mark on this yoga thing. But whatever.... Tomorrow is day 5. That means only 85 more days to go. Ha! I think I'll shorten my goals. Let's be realistic. I'm aiming for a week. If I make it a week, then maybe I'll set my goal at 30 days. After all, I can take pictures again at 30 days. And most of the people who's pics I looked at showed some progress at the 30 day mark. So, yeah, maybe 30 days is my goal. I only have 25 more to go if I do it that way! :)

And not to change the subject, but to change the subject. I ventured out among the crazy shoppers today to do some shopping. Somehow, logically, I know that makes me one of those crazies, but I like living in my alternate reality, so just leave me be. Got some great deals! My bras usually run 30-40 bucks each. I had a gift card to JC Penneys, and they had a sale: buy two at regular price, get two free. And then if you spent over 25 you got 10 off. Well, what I didn't know until I got up to the register was that they were also on sale. So, I got 4 bras for $23!!!!! Talk about savings! Loving JCP the day after xmas! A belt, new black heels, and a yellow Liz Claiborne sweater topped it off. I could have shopped more because I still had $$ left on the card, but I just couldn't handle the crazies anymore. :)
Back to work tomorrow. Not a long day, but a day nonetheless. Then three days in a row of working on the CSP grant application and the appeals arguments and combing through the district's rebuttals. If I have to be at work at 10, and I leave here at 9 to do so, and get up at 8 to get ready, what time would I have to get up to do day 5 of my program since I know I wont have the energy when I get home? 7? 6:45? Yeah, I'll try it. 'Night all!

12-23-10

So, I intended to start blogging for the new year, but I figured, with so much going on, why wait? Going to copy and paste the old myspace blog onto here so I can delete myspace and keep it all on one site... But for the new one: Here we go. I guess I should start with what I am starting with today, which is P90X. My sister in law and brother in law use it and swear by it. She sent it to us and I tried the Stretch X part of it yesterday. It wasn't as bad as I expected, so I am starting the actual program today. I had my lovely daughter, Sierra, take the before pics and I am 151 lbs as of today. I'm not posting the before pics until I have the thirty day pics. To do so without them would be humiliating. Sierra is going to start the program with me, and so is my husband, Charles (or Chuck, for his friends). 


later in the day:
Ok. So I just did the first day of the Lean schedule: Core. Ugh! But I did it. and I survived. I can't say I did it well, or that my form was good, but I did it. I may not have done the full minute they did, but I did some of it. I feel extremely shaky now. I wonder if that's normal? 


On another note, I wonder if there is a way to link my blog to my facebook page and vice versa? 
Going to do some baking tonight and get a head start on xmas dinner since I have to work xmas eve.